Better Now


A man looking at broken heart surrounded by tools. (Brennan King/MCT)

I wish I could say
“I feel so much better now,”
but I can’t,
because I’d be lying.
In fact, I feel
so much worse
than I did before.
Every day is
in its own special way.
How I’d love to
feel nothing again,
when all I know
is misery and
emptiness –
How I’d love to
afford myself peace,
because it’s unbearable
to keep going like this.
I wouldn’t want you
to feel bad at all.
I figured it’s
worth all the sorrow.
For some reason,
I decided you
were worth it.
I don’t want to
blame you,
because it’s really
my fault
for getting hurt,
isn’t it?